Back in the office

Thursday:

I've had two full days back in the office after ten years at home with chronic pain, then with kids, and then working from home. I'm loving many aspects of being back. The work is a little dull but by no means horrible, and I'm back with people! Adults, even! I haven't done much chatting but it's great to be surrounded by people. Much less lonely than at home. And I feel kind of important, too, striding around a multi-story office building with my security pass and my semi-corporate clothes. Frowning thoughtfully at TWO computer screens on my desk.

Wednesday is the only day I can work longer than school hours so yesterday was both my first full day at work and my long day. By the time I had walked home (and having to go right around the school to get in to pick up the kids from after-school care in the hall because all the other gates were locked by that time) I was truly exhausted. I made dinner then collapsed. I am still fighting off the germs from last weekend but I think it was mainly just that I am not used to working all day!

I walk to and from work so that is quite nice exercise each day but being in an office again is terrible for my diet. I'm taking my lunch and snacks but I'd forgotten the temptations of vending machines and people selling chocolates for charity. Today I saw a birthday one section over, no doubt I'll eventually be involved in those too at some point. Oh, and did I mention we are right next to the area's major shopping centre? So if I want to pop out at lunch time for anything, anything at all, I can. So far I haven't done very much resisting. I guess I'm going to have to start climbing a lot of stairs!

Caught

Tuesday:

I worked from home today but hopefully will get back into the office tomorrow. All the security forms are completed and lodged.

I didn't really mind staying home as I wasn't feeling that well. I'd been sick all weekend but better yesterday. Maybe it was just the excitement of a new job as I felt yuck again today. I didn't eat anything until nearly lunch time. I walked to the local post office (1 km away) and was exhausted by the time I got home, which is why ...

A zombie caught me!

I had often wondered what happens if a zombie catches you. I was going to tell you; but just in case you want to use the app, I won't.

I was just walking slowly and listening to the story when I got a warning that a zombie was 50 metres away (I walked a bit faster), then 20 metres away (faster still), then it was moaning in my ear which actually made me look over my shoulder and break into a trot even though I was feeling a bit sick. I had been told that speeding up was enough, you didn't have to run, but it caught me so maybe that isn't true.

Liebster Award

The Liebster Award

Jennifer from It's Just Jennifer has tagged me for The Liebster Award. No idea where that name/concept comes from.

Here are the rules:

1) Post 11 random facts about yourself

2) Answer the 11 questions the tagger has asked you
3) Choose 3 deserving bloggers, and ask them 11 new questions
4) Don't tag the person that nominated you

 Eleven Random Facts:

1) I love to sing and used to perform in a lot of amateur theatricals and karaoke competitions. Once I sang Eponine's soulful "On my Own" in an audition and got cast as a sassy aging stripper. Not the look I was going for!

2) I hate coffee, even the smell which most people like.

3) I'm scared of heights and creepy-crawlies. But I could hold a snake or cuddle a rat no problems. And I love snuggly enclosed spaces.

4) My grandmother had a pet kangaroo, not really that common in Australia. It was rescued as a joey when its mother was killed by dogs. It loved my grandmother but hated everyone else; growled like a dog and tried to kick and scratch you. I was scared to go into her backyard.

5) I just got glasses today! Love them. Everything is so sharp and clear.

6) I would love to write a novel one day. Fantasy fiction. There are plenty of times when I do have the time to work on it, but don't "get around to it".

7) I have a degree in Linguistics and learned little bits of five languages (including Latin) but can't remember much of any of them. Undergraduate Uni was a long time ago. My husband's brother married a Chinese woman so my husband recently suggested we should learn that. It's a tricky one because it's tonal.

8) I had an identical twin sister who died when we were babies. Once I was hypnotised and taken through a visualisation and was supposed to meet myself, but it was her.

9) I don't believe in ghosts, even though as a child both my brother and I saw my elder brother's ghost several times soon after he died (he was run over by a train when he was ten). It wasn't scary at all -- he was my brother! Still don't believe in them though. I was only six.

10) I like planning more than doing.

11) I have super powers. I can block my nose without touching it by squeezing the inner muscles, and I can dilate my eyes so I can see better in the dark.

And your questions are...

1) What is your favorite food?

Duck as a favourite main-course, chocolate as dessert, salty chips as a snack.

 

2) Sweet or salty?

Definitely salty.

3) Can you roll your tongue?

No.

4) What was your clique in school (prep, misfits, jock, band, etc.)?

We don't really have cliques in Australia. I don't even know what "prep" means. I was one of the smart kids but my group of ten that I sat with at lunch was a very eclectic mix. Probably the only point of commonality was that none of us was sporty.

5) Do you have any pets, or what would you have if you don't have any?

We only have goldfish at the moment but want to get a puppy soon. We haven't had fluffy pets before because my mother is allergic and it would cause problems when she visits overnight, but wanting a family pet has started to tip that balance. We'll have to visit her more often instead. Just waiting to get the fences fixed first.

6) If you had unlimited funds, and a month of free time, what would you do?

Tour Europe and Japan.

7) Who is your celebrity crush?

Don't have one atm. As a kid I loved David Bowie as Jareth from Labyrinth, and I've always thought Johnny Depp is gorgeous. Orlando Bloom as Legolas in LotR. Can you see a fantasy theme here? But I'm not really a fan kind of girl.

8) Do you collect anything?

No. Used to collect unicorns a bit as a teenager.

9) What size shoe do you wear?

6 and a half Australian (6 is the smallest adult size. I am short with little feet.)

 

10) Favorite color

Purple. And it's spelled "colour" here!

11) Do you sleep on your side, stomach, or back?

I sleep on my left side.

To pass this on, I nominate:
Jill from The Sassy Pear
Fat Guy Winning
Kathleen from 27 years old and 27 kilos too heavy

And your questions are:
 
1) Tea or coffee? With or without milk and/or sugar?

2) How old are you really, deep down inside?

3) Should you be working right now instead of doing this (I know I should)?

4) What is your favourite cheese? And could you tell brie and camembert apart in a taste test?

5) Are monkeys cute, or stinky poo-throwing monstrosities who would rip your face off as soon as look at you?

6) If you had to live for the next year in a country other than your own, where would it be?

7) If you could shorten your life by one year to magically lose 5 kilograms/10 pounds right now (with suitably tightened skin etc), would you do it? How many times? Is there anything physical about yourself that you would pay years of your life to change?

8) What would be your dream job if you had the aptitude/courage? Remember that if you are famous people go through your garbage and tell lies about you on the front cover of magazines. But you get lots of adulation and money and yachts and stuff.

9) Paper books or electronic?

10) Did you ever write teen-angst poetry, or any other kind?

11) Do you dance like no one is watching? Or like you are on stage and everyone is watching? Or do you shyly and awkwardly shuffle on the spot and hope no one is watching? Or stand in the corner while other people dance?

First day at work, sort of

Monday:

I walked to my new workplace this morning. It was probably just above freezing by that time, but I was snug enough walking briskly and wrapped in my coat and scarf and beanie and gloves. My new pants had been shortened to just the right length and they were comfortable and all was good with the world. I didn't even listen to music until the last bit, I just walked. I was a little worried about the heavy cloud cover, but it cleared up later.

The first morning was taken up with finding out that no one had computer access, and in fact we didn't have security access either so had to be escorted everywhere around the building. Even to the toilet, apparently, although I just ignored that and went by myself -- it was maybe twenty metres away from my desk and I was in full view all the way to the door. My boss was only there for about half an hour because she had to go to a funeral. I was one of three starting today, all women in the prime of their lives. We were given some reading material but then were herded from floor to floor with stops to fill out forms, trying to get us access. Then they sent us home at lunchtime so they wouldn't have to escort us everywhere anymore. I will probably be working from home tomorrow, I've already been emailed some work to do but in fact was finishing my security clearance stuff until late. Hopefully we will be able to go in Wednesday. Had to laugh about being sent home and asked if I minded -- I only took this job to get out of the house!

Before going home I picked up my new glasses, which only took a week after all. I'm used to wearing sunglasses a lot so they don't seem intrusive, and I love wearing them. My eyes are still pretty good, it's only 0.5, but everything looks so much sharper. And I look (even) smarter.

I listened to the introductory session of the Zombies, Run app on the way home, but it was the same as the intro to the C25K version. Still good, though.

There is a stairwell at work! I'll be able to do some stair climbing in my breaks. And an hour walking each day is nice. As long as it doesn't rain. There is no parking left by the time of morning I get there.

Carbohydrate binge and a cold

Saturday:

Huge carb cravings yesterday. Maybe because it was a really cold day, maybe because I've been reading a book about how bad carbs are for me (which of course made me think about them), partly because I scratched my eyeball first thing in the morning and spent the next four hours with a very sore eye and was squinting and blinking with tears running down my face, and now I think maybe because I was coming down with a cold.

For whatever reason/s, I spent the whole day fighting off cravings to eat sugary carbohydrates. Then in the evening (straight after dinner, when I wasn't even hungry) I caved and ate two slices of bread slathered in butter, some chocolate, and then half a bag of Doritos and a cider.

I spent the evening exhausted and with a headache, which I thought at the time could be because of my binge, but woke this morning with a sore throat and feeling generally yuck and I think I have a cold. I was hoping I'd feel better once I'd been up for a while, but I'm definitely getting worse. We had big plans for this weekend but I think I'm going to have to stay home which is a bummer. I could drag myself around, but I worry about passing on germs to my aging mother and my baby niece, amongst others. The thought of spending hours in the car, sleeping on a horrible futon, and being sociable all weekend also just sounds like a nightmare. Will have to postpone. I need my soft bed and my undemanding television. And I need to get well by Monday! I'm not taking a sick day on my first day of work. (You can see I care a lot less about infecting my new colleagues than my family.)

So why DO we get fat?

later Thursday:

My zombie-fleeing friend told me that the original Zombies, Run! app (not the C25K one I have) doesn't actually require you to run, it is designed so you can walk as well -- you just have to speed up from whatever you were doing when a zombie appears. A brisker walk is fine. So I downloaded it today and am happy to have my zombies back. Unfortunately it hadn't finished downloading by the time I went out, but I'll use it to walk to work.

I walked half an hour to the hairdresser (and incidentally found it will take me about 20 mins to walk to work, where I start on Monday) through a chilly morning. I love the massage and the hair-washing. The hairdresser did what I asked and I think the cut is ok, but it's hard to tell at present because despite my saying at least twice that I don't like my hair straightened, she blow-dried it straight down beside my face. It really doesn't suit me. And two minutes after going back into the wind I was left with a mouthful of hair and a bird's nest on my head. I'll wait and see until I wash it next and get its natural wave back.

I went to the shops and found myself a pair of black work pants (yay!) and put them in to be shortened. Then had a lovely lunch at a Thai restaurant. It was a lunch special with rice and a chicken/vegetable dish, and when it came out it was so big my first thought was to take half home. But I ended up eating it all except I only had a little bit of the rice. On my tracker, I counted it as my own home-made stir fry plus extra meat, the cashews, the bit of rice, and presumably sugar in the sauce. So quite a lot more calories, really!

Then I walked home, another half an hour of briskness (carrying a backpack full of fruit this time), then into the afternoon routine of taking Child 2 to gymnastics, Child 1 to the library, home for a while, pick up Child 2, make dinner...

Since everyone else in the house loves pasta (so do I, for that matter) but I'm not eating it at the moment, I made myself a baked chicken breast and vegetables with really hot sauce. It was great! I didn't miss the pasta at all. As long as I make myself something yummy, I don't resent not eating stuff like that.

A book I picked up for myself at the library is Gary Taubes' Why We Get Fat and what to do about it, and although I don't like the title (it just seems a bit dumbed down) I am finding it fascinating. I should disclaim, first, that I don't necessarily believe everything I read -- it would be almost impossible these days as everything contradicts everything else. But I enjoy exploring the arguments. Anyway, Taubes argues that there isn't, and never has been, any evidence that either low calorie diets OR exercise do anything to help you lose weight. He looks at the original studies that this idea was based on and debunks them. I am only a quarter of the way through but he says up front in the Introduction that it's easily digested carbohydrates that are the problem, not the balance of calories in/calories out, because of their affect on hormones like insulin which then trigger you to get fat.

I have been convinced for quite a while that exercise -- while good for you in many ways including strength, endurance, and mood -- does not make me lose weight, but the idea that the number of calories I eat doesn't have relevance is a bit hard to get my head around. I will read on.

Relaxed

Thursday:

I feel so much more relaxed and happier these past couple of days since the work stress is over. I've done some dancing and some housework and some mooching around. I've organised/completed various things like a haircut (going today), check-up with my doctor, filling in long annoying forms that have been sitting around for ages, caught up on some TV I missed. I am so conflict-averse that dealing with a difficult client was really affecting me.

I just needed a repeat script from the doctor, my own was booked up for the week so I willingly saw someone else at the same clinic. My husband and I both like our doctor but lately I have felt she has been a bit dismissive of things important to me -- like when my blood sugar results came back in the pre-diabetic range she just told me to lose some weight, I had to use my own initiative to read lots of books and go to tutorials with the local diabetes association who took it seriously.

This doctor I saw yesterday was lovely. As is usual, even though she had all my notes and only needed my blood pressure to write my script, she went through some history with me since she hadn't seen me before. She was much more interested in things the other doctor didn't care about (girly stuff I won't go into) and also brought up the pre-diabetes thing and wants to send me for another test since it has been nearly a year (actually only about nine months). I'm going to do the oral glucose test again and also the test that somehow gives you a three month average of blood glucose levels.

Some people might prefer a doctor who just tells you not to worry, perfectly normal, but I prefer to take action early and know all my options. So I might just stick with this new doctor.

My eating is still going well, generally very clean all day but I have been having a bit of chocolate most evenings and that really should be a "sometimes food".